Young girl don't cry

I think I'm officially an insomniac. Like seriously punya this time. I didn't sleep for 4 days straight! When I said that didn't sleep, I mean betul-betul tak tido. Not even a nap! Oh and the thing that people said if you didn't sleep for 3 days you akan nampak hantu, well that's a FREAKING LIE! I don't see no ghost! or maybe not yet la kot. hehe

So I've been thinking a lot lately, ofcoz I have to think alot la kan since it's final exam week. Imagine, exam week + readings + no sleep at all can do to your brain. Gila lah! so yeah, back to the part that I was thinking tu, I just learned that I have some emotional issue.

I know it's kinda weird for me to put this in public reading material but somehow I wanted to.

You know some people just can't stand other people being happy? you would go all crazy jealous and stuff? yeah that's me.

I have this orange book where I always write all my missions and stuff that I need to accomplish at some moments in my life. I wrote this and that hoping that one day that all these stuff will come true. Mostly about doing crazy adventurous stuff during uni life an all. I'm big on creating moments. I love spontaneous things, an adrenaline junkie and exploring is my thing. Yeah, that is me.

But then when reality strikes, I just can't do all that when I'm here in Arau. I just can't. I don't have any transport to travel around, I don't have the right people to understand my jokes, I don't have anyone to be there when I wanna do something crazy. I feel like I don't have anything. I feel so.. pathetic and kinda lost at the same time. It's almost 2 years I'm here in Arau but still.. I can't face the fact that I'm sooo tercampak jauh dari semua benda. Can't accept that I can't accomplish my mission, pergi concert, jalan-jalan teroka sana-sini. I'm missing out on everything that I wanna do so bad every. single. time!

So, when I heard that other people do this and that, I feel like I don't achieve anything in my life, I have no exciting things to tell. Just boring mimi, that's what I always thought of myself. And I feel bad for Haziq, yeah him especially coz whenever he's trying to tell me about all the exciting things, I started to feel jealous, angry and down about myself. That's so not right! I'm supposed to be happy not crazy psychotic angry. Sigh

I dunno what to do to make me feel like home here. Coz I really wanna feel like the old me again, you know the gelak kuat-kuat bimbo gila mimi? yes,I need her back. Kinda losing that girl everytime I'm here.

Just trust the voice within

Bye long hair

Cut my long hair at last. I know , I know..back to old skool Mimi.

Recharge

Study week has started and as always, I took a study leave and went back home last week! Weee! Freaking worth it since I had a very stressful time in Arau. Dengan assignment yang menghadap lappie like most of the time, cuaca panas macam neraka yang membuatkan muka jadi buruk gila and lotsa lotsa negative energy so why not balik rumah for seminggu lebih kan. Brings back my chi and regain my positive energy. hoho

So yeah, spent most of my time with le familia and le beau. Ahh hati senang when I get to see them again. It's like all the negative energy went poof! Sadly tak dapat celebrate birthday Shiqin and meet up with the others coz I was kinda busy with errands but lain kali kita boleh berjumpa. Kinda miss my homies though. Let's buat gathering again bila-bila? How about karaoke session at Redbox ke this time? ;)

Anyways wish me luck for finals! I want DL so so badly I could panjat gunung right now!

ps. Thank you love, for that awesome week. I had a really great time with you :*

Yang halus Yang tulus

Alright I'm kinda weeks late for this post but bohoo screw that. I still wanna post about it. Oh I'm talking about my dinner actually. Sem 4 dinner and the theme was *drumrolls* Bollywood in Arabic Desert.

One word to describe the night. AWESOME!

This time the part 4 students yang organized this dinner. Was having doubts about how the event would go but in the end hmmm everything was a blast! Oh oh.. did I tell you that I performed on that night? hehehee

leggo, let the pics do the talking. I knew I should have update this blog sooner so that the feeling is still fresh but oh well..

Wore this kaftan for that night. Ohh terkenang zaman kegemilangan. :')

Wardah, I tried to pose like her though but then epic fail. haha

I have to say that everyone look so pretty and festive that night.

the girls and me

the boys. Wooh macha habis

mirror mirror on the wall, who's the macha-ness of them all. haha

pak arabs jubah putih. Sejuk pabila memandang :p

wondering why this person is eating outside macam dayang suruhan?

lemme tell you the story guys..

COZ WE HAVE TO! haha well, apparently the Part1 students who were planning not to attend the dinner crashed the party. Eventho that I'm not the person who's handling the foods and stuff but I was pissed I tell you. All the part 4 students have to go back of the dewan and eat. But one thing for sure, It was fun! Maybe it looks like macam kesian gila but sebenarnya lagi meriah. Macam kenduri dah blakang dewan and the part 4's are like bergabung semua :)

oh ehem ehem here comes the performance time

just forget the others and concentrate on me ok? ngeheh

Mimpi laila by Halim and the boys

Now its Halim and the boys + me! :p

Ghazal untuk Rabiah

Halim, Ikram and Don

few of my friends had the video to this but I'm lazy to post it here and anywhere. Malu lah. ;)

Don

Fariz Ikram

The host for the night and my tabla player

well that is all for the night. Hope that next sem's would be as nice as this one.

Ps. had a post party after the dinner. Girls in kaftan gone wild ;p

For a pair of blue heels

Pheww I get to online at last! One thing that I hate the most when I get back to Perlis, my internet connection gone terus. Hijau forever. Grr. Anyways went back for CNY holiday last week. Eventho I only had 5 days of holidays but I must say that it was nice. Its good to be back home again walaupun baru je cuti for New Year haritu kan.

Oh yeah, had syams-day-out with yang lain dan tak bukan, Syamir! woot woot. Asked him to teman me beli my dream high heels dekat Pull and Bear, Since dekat Ou tak ada pulak size 36 which is seriously a bummer, I had to drive to Pavi semata-mata nak beli. Sanggup gitu.

Driving at KL with Syamir sumpah epic. Since both of us had not-so-good sense of direction, I took the en route to Jalan Pudu. Sampai sana, Ya Rabbi.. Kl dah tak macam Malaysia dah! Penuh Myanmar, Vietnam Nepal sume crossing the road macam Slumdog Millionaire dah.

I was kinda scared that those people akan panjat my car and hang on it. Omg I'm so mean! :p

Me: Syamir sumpah takut ohh, aku rasa dorang boleh gayut atas kereta aku ni. Aku tak kesah kalau kitaorng salah masuk jalan lagi aku nak balik!

Syamir: Ehh janganlah, dah sampai sini kot. Takkan nak patah balik, abitu kasut kau macam mana?

Lol. I'm such a drama queen, padahal dorang tak kacau pon. Anyways sampai jugak Pavi and I got ze shoes yay!

Wanted to watch Underworld..drove back to Ou la kan sebab nanti nak hantar Syamir balik senang. Then, on our way back home..tiba-tiba a loud fan noise coming out from my car. It was super scary sampai Syamir dah tadah tangan baca doa dah. Seriously kereta macam dah nak meletup and since both of us are too scared to die in the car together, I pulled off dekat this taman perumahan near Tropicana City Mall.

Ok, best part was, that taman perumahan is super dark. It will be another bangang moment if tetiba ada Jais tangkap kitaorng hahah. Thank god nothing happend la. Checked my car siap test drive dekat kawasan yang gelap bagai then I called my dad asking him about the car

My dad told me that it was normal, bla bla bla something to do with the absorber bla bla. Ayah setiap hari jadi macam tu. (ok that was the funny part) and he said that lagi teruk bunyinya if naik bukit.

So, apa lagi, both of us rock and roll je la continue our journey nak tengok Underworld. The moment sampai flyover dekat TC mall tu, kereta mengaum last-last I can't masuk gear! I was like SH** and tadaa.. BREAKDOWN TEPI JALAN. yayy!! grr thank god I managed to stop tepi jalan if not..malu je oh and there's fireworks too :D

So there it goes, another adventure nak pegi tengok wayang. Well, the breakdown didn't stop our mission, called my dad and Fadzil to the rescue. Thanks man. Then at last, UNDERWORLD!!! Both of us were trying to blame each other for what happened that day but then we just realized that we spent 9 hours together and walaupun bangang moments sentiasa ada.. in the end, it was a really nice day :)

LDR sucks! :(

Hubby sent this video to me..



After watching..

goosshhh, what did I get myself into..This video makes me missing my boy so much. Grr. I know that this video contains a lot of mooshy kissing scenes but it really touches my feelings. It's like I can relate how they feel and all. For those who's in LDR they sure know the feeling of being far away from their loved ones and I have to say that eventho me and my boy tak sampai 5983 miles away. He's in Malacca je pon but it's really hard for not being able to see each other and it's killing me that I couldn't be there with him during the hard times. The feeling of missing him is almost unbearable sometimes *jiwang mood but it's true. It's hard.

It's harder if you know that you still can't see each other even if ada holiday pon and the parting time is the worst. I think I can't hold back my tears everytime I know that we will be apart the next day. :( I often jealous whenever I see other couples dekat campus and I get angry if people don't appreciate their partner. grr.

but im grateful that I'm not that far away from Haziq like that couple. Eventho that I'm far in the north and he's in the south but we're still in Malaysia. There's no different time zone and we can still text,call and skype. Plus it's just a 10 hours drive from Perlis to Melaka. It's been a month now since I last saw him and there are 2 months to go till we meet each other again.I just have to be patient that's all.